Sunday, September 2, 2007

Choosing life and going forward in faith...

Yesterday the sermon was on going forward in faith. Our head elder, who gave the sermon, spoke on Mark 9:17-29. In verse 22, the father of the son that was demon-possessed said to Jesus, "but if You can do anything, do have pity on us and help us." 23 "And Jesus said, [You say to Me], If you can do anything? [Why,] all things can be--are possible--to him who believes!" 24 "At once the father of the boy gave (an eager, piercing, inarticulate) cry with tears, and he said, Lord, I believe! Constantly help my weakness of faith!"

The sermon really spoke to me because I had just had a dream that morning that at first seemed like an awful dream, but later as I was writing about how weak and helpless I sometimes feel, I sensed that it may have been symbolic, rather than literal and it spoke to me of being broken, helpless, so weak and without faith. In the dream I was beside a car that had been in an accident. There was a woman lying on the floorboard on the passenger side, all broken and unable to move, but able to talk. It seemed almost as if I was her and yet I spoke to her. I said, "Give me your hand." She said, "I can't." I replied, "That's OK, I'll just hold your hand." I then reached over, took a hold of her hand and held it tightly, while saying, "It's OK." "Don't worry, I'll stay here with you."

While telling my brother of the dream, he said how it reminded him of how God just reaches down and takes our hand when we are too weak to help ourselves. So true. My brother has been struggling with smoking and drinking again and feels so helpless and I feel so helpless to help him.

Too often I have also found myself back at square one, starting over after trying so hard for so long, not with alcohol, but with my own issues. I know how discouraging it feels to be back there. In fact, last night I felt quite discouraged about several things in my life and about my brother's life. But then during my prayer time this morning, I realized that I must step forward in faith, I must not give up on praying for myself, my brother, or others. The enemy wants us to give up, but God is right there with us saying, "Don't give up!" "All things are possible to him/her that believes."

I also realized today that as hard as it is to start over, as hard as it is to get back up, we must. Sometimes we are so broken we just have to sit there a while and let God hold our hand and tell us it will be OK, but eventually we must get up again. We must choose life for as long as we can! We must go forward in faith!