Tuesday, March 15, 2011

Results of non-values' based decision making...

I’m actually feeling very resentful and angry today at my job, the people I work with, the projects on my plate, the “group” think that goes on, and the enemy who deceived me.

I value money, but not above time to relax, time to spend with family and friends, time to have a relationship with someone special, etc. And yet, I chose money over having time available to me. So, why did I choose money over time? Did I choose it over time because I also thought I would have opportunity to grow which is more important to me than money? Yes, that would definitely be one of the reasons. Unfortunately, it turns out that I have to grow all on my own, without any help or training, which was not what I expected or wanted. Are there any other reasons I chose money over a less stressful life? What was I really seeking when I chose this job over the job I had?
  • Money
  • Growth
  • A prestigious-sounding title
  • Acknowledgement or appreciation for what I do
Unfortunately, what I actually received is stress, feelings of failure, a job I don't enjoy, no acknowledgement or appreciation for what I do, additional money, but with it came additional expenses, so I'm not any further ahead financially, growth that is a constant struggle, since I'm having to learn everything through trial and error, rather than receiving training, a prestigious-sounding title without the skills to go with it, and I have less time available to me, which I value more.

This has definitely been a learning lesson, albeit a painful one. Hopefully, I'll be able to correct the situation within a reasonable time frame, Lord willing.